Ninjineer

Annoyance Update: Crossing Over into the Absurd

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 15:01:25 +1100

Despite assurances to the contrary, the Wednesday flight arrived today unburdened with the weight of my two coolers. Rumor has it they’ve shacked up in a dive on Guam and are busy raising little thermos babies. Their passion has led them to disregard the ham and the pair of Thanksgiving turkeys chilling (or more likely: formerly chilling now decomposing) inside them.

To their credit, the local Continental staff are fully sharing in my annoyance. In fact, the manager was so apologetic he took me to the grocery store and bought me a turkey and a ham. (Hurray, the holiday is saved!) At local prices, that set the airline back about $140. It was really an unexpected gesture, since normal airline policy for perishables would leave me SOL.

So Much Annoyance For Such A Short Trip

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 16:43:52 +1100

Background

Continental is the only airline servicing Pohnpei. On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays they have an island hopper flight that starts in Guam, stops in Chuuk, Pohnpei, Kosrae, Kwajalein, and Majuro, and terminates in Honolulu. On Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, the island hopper hits all the same islands going the opposite direction. (Note: these dates are from a Pohnpeian perspective. These flights cross the international date lines which makes the days subjective.) Also, there is a seventh weekly flight commonly called the night flight. On Sunday evenings, it goes Guam - Chuuk - Pohnpei - Chuuk - Guam.

The Plan

I needed to assist my brother-in-law with some computer upgrades in Kosrae and Chuuk. Since this wasn’t for my regular job, I needed to minimize my time away from work. The schedule that best met this requirement had me leave for Kosrae on Friday, catch the Saturday flight to Chuuk, and return to Pohnpei on the Sunday night flight.

After checking-in in Pohnpei, I got called back to the ticket counter just before the security screening was about to close. It seems that one of my checked boxes was too big. Not overweight, just dimensionally-challenged. Apparently, the height, width, and depth of an article cannot exceed 62 inches. Mine stretched to 68 inches. Since the box fell within the “over-sized” category, they wanted me to cough up an extra $80. They offered to let me go out on the tarmac in the rain and cut the box down to an acceptable size. I was ready to do it, though, they would have to provide the cutting tool, since sharp objects are not allowed passed security screening. Fortunately, a manager stepped in and allowed the box on without surgery or a fee.
The upgrades in Kosrae went smoothly, and we headed to Chuuk as planned. When the plane reached Chuuk, the skies were pissing rain. The pilot circled a few times, but there was no sign of the rain letting up enough for a landing. He opted then to overfly Chuuk and continue on to Guam.
When we landed, a Continental service rep was there to assist my brother-in-law and me. He confirmed that we could take the Sunday night flight at 10pm to get to Chuuk. I pointed out that I would not be able to stop in Chuuk and needed to continue on to Pohnpei, per my original itinerary. Not a problem, he confirmed.
Around 4pm, we went to a store to purchase some coolers and some frozen meat. (In the islands, it’s often impossible or at least very expensive to get certain goods. Hence, when returning from civilization, it’s common practice to bring coolers of stuff back.) At the store, we ran into a friend who works at Continental. We told him about our messed up trip. He was surprised when we told him we were departing at 10. He whipped out his cell phone and confirmed: our flight left at 7:40, not 10:00. Without that chance encounter, we’d have arrived at the airport too late.
When we get to the airport, they’re way overbooked with all the people who were supposed to be Chuuk and are calling for volunteers to give up their seats. I might have taken the offer, but I’ve got coolers. They won’t wait. Then I get up to the ticket agent. The fact that I’m going on to Pohnpei rather than deplaning in Chuuk caused some sort of mix up. They cannot assign me a seat. They give me a Stand-By boarding pass and send me to the gate where hopefully an agent there can find space for me.
The gate agent worked a wonder and scored me the last business class seat. Can’t complain about that.
In Pohnpei, I was actually the first person off the plane. This was a great position since it meant I’d be the first through the glacial immigration processing. Just before I reached the station, I pulled out my paperwork and discovered I did not have my passport. I moved to the side and rifled my bag. No luck, so I ran back to the plane. No passport in the overhead bin or in my seat. The flight attendant asked if I had checked my pockets. A quick pat revealed I’d stuffed in my front pocket.
Relieved but feeling like an idiot, I returned to immigration. I was the very last person in the line which stretched outside into the rain.
I finally got to luggage claim, only there was no luggage to claim. A customer service rep checked. Both of my coolers had stayed in Guam. She assured me, though, they would come on the Monday flight, arriving around noon. Concerned that the delay would mean a bunch of defrosted meat, I went home and to bed. It was 2am and I had to be up for work in a few hours.
I met the noon flight. No coolers. The rep showed me on his list where it said my luggage should be there. Only it wasn’t; it was still in Guam. He asked me to describe the bags and winced when I told him they were coolers of meat. The next flight is not until Wednesday …

meltinyourmouth: Awww…how sad!! I keep hearing how nothing...

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 09:00:05 +1100

meltinyourmouth:

Awww…how sad!!

I keep hearing how nothing rhymes with ‘orange’, but to my ear ‘range’ seems to. Maybe my understanding of rhyming is missing some vital component.

Tumblr Theme: Parchment Under Glass — Archeologists laboring at...

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 11:23:49 +1200

Tumblr Theme: Parchment Under Glass — Archeologists laboring at a dig in an undisclosed location recently unearthed a remarkably well preserved collection of scrolls. With pain-staking focus on preservation protocols, they extract each scroll and ship it via armored caravan to their sponsoring museum. There, the curators gently untie the binding ribbon and unroll the parchment. They then place the document under a glass sheet to keep it from curling and to protect it from the environment. Thus protected, researchers may peruse the contents at their leisure…

For those interested, here also is the Theme Garden link.

"These products not tested on animals. But if you’ve got pets, and would like to do your part..."

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 11:38:51 +1200

“These products not tested on animals. But if you’ve got pets, and would like to do your part for scientific inquiry…”

- Printed on the rip cord to open the package containing my new Despair calendar.

"I feel sorry for unicorns. No other mythical monster has suffered such brand degradation. Nowadays,..."

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 10:08:49 +1200

“I feel sorry for unicorns. No other mythical monster has suffered such brand degradation. Nowadays, unicorns are synonymous with weak, childlike, unrealistic naivety. You don’t see folks dissing dragons the way they do unicorns. No one ever equates griffins with rainbows, glitter, and six year olds. The sphinx isn’t cheesy. But the unicorn? The symbol of kings, the darling of artists, the keeper of a magical horn whose rumored mystical properties once made it worth more than its weight in gold and almost drove a real species (the narwhal) to extinction? The unicorn has become laughable.”

- Diana Peterfreund

"And they cut off your wings and replace them with string Now the strings are attached to..."

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 09:57:55 +1200

“And they cut off your wings and replace them with string
Now the strings are attached to everything
It’s twisted and tangled and troubled with anger
But somehow you still swing”

- Soul Asylum
“Marionette” from Hang Time

"I checked my fucked-o-meter. The guage was firmly set on ‘Seven ways from Sunday.’"

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 11:06:54 +1200

“I checked my fucked-o-meter. The guage was firmly set on ‘Seven ways from Sunday.’”

- Eric
Staked by J. F. Lewis, pg 104

A Bit of a Movie Slump

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 11:05:43 +1200

Aliens in the Attic — Watch the trailer and save yourself a couple hours.
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince — I greatly enjoyed the broomstick’s-eye-view opening sequence. It would make an awesome theme park ride. However, I was ultimately disappointed. The entire Half-Blood Prince thread of the book was so diluted that what little remained was confusing and incoherent.
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra — While I do have fond memories of watching G.I. Joe after school, I was not a devotee. Thundercats was far cooler to my adolescent mind. So, I only went into the movie hoping for a couple hours of mindless escapism. In this I was not disappointed. I just have to be careful not to think too hard about it.
G-Force — I’m trying to recall something redeeming about the gerbil spies, but I’m drawing a blank. Honestly, while watching it I kept hoping the diabolical industrialist would just toss aside his glasses, sprout fangs, and berate the rodents for being abominations a la Underworld. Then Selene could then have dropped in and started blasting the gerbils for being lycan wannabes.

Recent Reads

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 10:40:40 +1200

Furies of Calderon, Academ’s Fury, Cursor’s Fury, and Captain’s Fury by Jim Butcher — Another long business trip gave me the time I needed to chew through the first four books of the Codex Alera, Butcher’s other series. They were good, even if they were completely different than the Dresden Files.
Jhegaala by Steven Brust — Another in the long line of Vlad Taltos books.
My Own Kind of Freedom by Steven Brust — It was not unlike discovering a lost Firefly episode. And that is a precious thing indeed.
The Stepsister Scheme by Jim C. Hines — Its fairy tale roots reminded me of Shrek, but with a much healthier dose of realism.
Medusa by Clive Cussler and Paul Kemprecos — I was excited to pick up this book, because I had heard parts of it take place on Pohnpei. They did their research right—all the names and dates were correct, but obviously they had never been here—the modern details were way off. However, since not all that many people have been here, I doubt there’s an abundance of people who noticed the problems.
Norse Code by Greg van Eekhout — After a good build up, the end of the world came and went way too fast.
Staked by J. F. Lewis — This author got it right. When his vampires are exposed to sunlight, they burst into flames. None of this namby-pamby sparkling crap. His vampires also actually kill people, often messily.

"Get to make some cheap jokes and buy cheaper souvenirs If this were Disneyworld, I’d buy a..."

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 10:13:42 +1200

“Get to make some cheap jokes and buy cheaper souvenirs
If this were Disneyworld, I’d buy a pair of Elvis-ears”

- The Dead Milkmen
“Graceland” from Bucky Fellini

"And now we find that we’ll take flight only when we fall."

Fri, 28 Aug 2009 09:35:02 +1200

“And now we find that we’ll take flight only when we fall.”

- Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers
“Maybe We Should Fall in Love” from No More Beautiful World

(via LifeHacker.com)

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 10:33:39 +1200

(via LifeHacker.com)

"Because really, adult life is not about getting all the things that make you look stable and..."

Mon, 17 Aug 2009 12:27:07 +1200

“Because really, adult life is not about getting all the things that make you look stable and successful. Adult life is about constantly making difficult decisions about what you are going to give up.”

- Penelope Trunk

I wish all my order confirmation emails were this much fun.

Sat, 15 Aug 2009 16:44:00 +1200

I wish all my order confirmation emails were this much fun.

Tumblr Theme: Undercover Operative 2.0 — The spy returns with a...

Sat, 15 Aug 2009 15:25:08 +1200

Tumblr Theme: Undercover Operative 2.0 — The spy returns with a new disguise. If you look closely, though, some of the details shine through from the previous version. Hopefully, this theme will pop up in a theme garden near you very soon. And if it’s rejected again, well, at least I can say I’m using it for my tumblelog.

Neuschwanstein Castle - View of the back — (Photo taken...

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 10:47:59 +1200

Neuschwanstein Castle - View of the back — (Photo taken 2006-07-29)

Neuschwanstein Castle - Looking up one side — (Photo taken...

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 10:46:37 +1200

Neuschwanstein Castle - Looking up one side — (Photo taken 2006-07-29)

Neuschwanstein Castle - Courtyard — (Photo taken 2006-07-30)

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 10:45:09 +1200

Neuschwanstein Castle - Courtyard — (Photo taken 2006-07-30)

Neuschwanstein Castle - Seen from the road up to it — (Photo...

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 10:43:28 +1200

Neuschwanstein Castle - Seen from the road up to it — (Photo taken 2006-07-30)